Added: Uvaldo Lail - Date: 15.05.2022 09:14 - Views: 17726 - Clicks: 5053
If you have a guy friend you feel close to, you may be wondering if his feelings are more than friendship. Maybe you are starting to like him and want to know if the feelings are one-sided. Or maybe you want to know if some of the s he's giving you are more than friendship because you don't want a relationship and need to know if you need to head things off before they get serious. Whatever your motivation, it can be tricky to analyze the behavior of other people.
It would be great if we could all be direct and open about our feelings and concerns. Unfortunately, it's rarely that easy. Nobody wants to blow up a peaceful friendship because they took a kind gesture the wrong way. Sometimes it's best to take the time and reflect on what you see and hear from him to decide if it's worth bringing up more directly.
But how do you do that? Interpreting people's behavior objectively is nearly impossible. We all have our ideas of what different actions mean based on our own philosophies and backgrounds. It's hard enough to understand what's going on even when we have time to reflect, let alone in the heat of the moment. Fortunately, there are some general guidelines you can use to get a feel for your guy friend's feelings. These guidelines are not perfect.
Maybe he gives you a lot of compliments because he's interested in you, or maybe he thinks he's just polite. It's best to use this article as a starting point for understanding the nature of your relationship with your guy friend.
If you are noticing a lot of the behaviors or situations described below, or some of them show up a lot, that's a that stronger feelings than friendship may be present. Before you start analyzing your guy friend's actions, it is worth remembering this key principle. We are, all of us, individually responsible for ourselves. Each person must be the steward of their own needs and desires. It is healthy and acceptable to tell other people what you want and expect. Beyond that, however, other people get to choose whether or not they want to provide what you are asking for. In your situation, this means that even if you determine that your guy friend does want more out of your relationship than friendship, you are under no obligation to reciprocate or accept his behavior.
It is fine for him to have feelings for you. If you like him, it's fine to return the affection. But him liking you, while an explanation for his behavior, does not mean you have to tolerate his behavior if it makes you uncomfortable.
It also doesn't mean that you have to maintain the relationship if you don't want to. Some people, when they find out a guy has feelings for them, would rather not attempt a friendship. The pressure of romantic desire, even if it's one-sided, can be hard to live with. If you decide that you would rather not be friends with someone while they have stronger feelings for you, that is just fine. People used to think that guys were less romantic than women.
They used to believe that men generally cared less about love and attachment. Modern research exposed that the opposite was true; men were more likely to develop strong feelings than women more quickly. Unsurprisingly, men and women have complicated emotional lives.
However, many men are also often raised in a way that does not encourage emotional openness. While we have come a long way in normalizing vulnerability, there is still a cultural stigma that discourages some men from sharing their feelings.
When people can't communicate directly about what they want and what they are struggling with, the desires and problems don't just go away. The surface in unexpected ways. This is the source of many psychological and personal struggles. We lash out at friends because we are jealous of their lives. We overeat because we don't know how to face our depression.
When it comes to men and potential romantic partners, it's no different. If he has feelings for you, whether he knows it or not, his behavior towards you will give you some of what he wants. Learning to read those s can help protect your feelings. There are specific behaviors that are common indicators of affection beyond friendship, and we review those below.
Before that, however, there are two big tips to help you start identifying whether or not there is something more to the way he treats you than just friendship. We all have a general behavior pattern we apply to our interpersonal interactions. This is what becomes your personality, and it outlines the general shape of how you respond to different stimuli. For example, friendly people respond with warmth and curiosity, where unfriendly respond with cool disinterest. When you think about your guy friend, how does he behave with most other people, and how, if at all, does it change when you are around?
Try to look at his behavior in all situations. How does he act when you are both with other people vs. How does he act when you aren't around? There is no definitive way that his behavior will change that will tell you he is harboring feelings for you. If he's naturally shy and he likes you, he might act shyer around you, or he may try to act confident around you.
What's important is if there is a noticeable difference to the way he engages with you over your other friends. When you are outside a relationship and see two people starting to flirt even when they say they're just friends, it can seem obvious.
Similarly, if a guy friend of yours is giving s that he likes you, there are probably other people who have at least wondered if something is going on. Getting another friend's perspective can help you figure out what's going on and how to handle it. Ask your friends if they think he's flirting with you. They may know something that you don't about him. Maybe he has talked to them about you. Or maybe your other friends have seen him interact with other women and know that the way he acts with you is different. There may also be something else going on in his life that inspires his actions with you beyond romantic interest.
Asking your other friends helps you get the whole picture for understanding what's going on. Here is a list of common als of romantic interest from men. Whether or not these indicate affection will vary from person to person.
If he's naturally flirtatious, for example, then him being flirty with you doesn't mean much. The goal is to see how many of these show up, how often, and how strongly. There are so many different s of being flirty. Lots of touching, playful jokes, standing close to you, looking intently into your eyes, all of these and more can be s he's drawn to you as more than a friend.
Try to see if he does these things a lot with you. If he does, and also doesn't have a tendency to do it with other people, he may be into you. If he's a macho guy, but the barriers seem to come down around you, that's a that he at least wants to be more vulnerable with you. Similarly, if he's normally confident and bold, but seems to get tripped up with what to say around you, you're probably making him feel flustered because he likes you.
He asks a lot of questions about your past and seems to remember a lot of details.
He likes to hang out with you a lot and is eager to set up a one-on-one time to talk and laugh together. Maybe he has a good memory and gets coffee with everyone. But usually we hang on to the details of things and people we consider important, and if he likes you, knowing things like your birthday and wanting to chat more are probably going to happen.
When you see him, does he always give you compliments? Does he always seem genuinely excited to see you, eager to hear about everything you've been doing? Do you sometimes catch him staring at you when you don't expect?
All of these things are s that he is subconsciously placing a lot of value on your presence and well-being. Maybe he follows your social media posts closely and likes and comments on your achievements. Maybe he seems to have no problem doing favors for you, big or small, and generally acts like he's happy to help out in any way.
Or maybe he makes the effort to notice and compliment small changes, from wardrobe upgrades to a new haircut. Whatever it is, he's trying hard to be supportive and encouraging. Determining whether or not a guy friend likes you can be tricky. Once you are pretty sure that he does, however, the next steps can be pretty straightforward.
Do you like him? If you are fairly certain that your guy friend is interested in a romantic relationship and you want the same, it's an easy enough thing to tell him you feel the same way, or even ask him out. Everyone is scared to ask someone out; rejection is painful. If you believe you have the opportunity to know ahead of time that he'll almost definitely say yes, then you should go for it. Do you think a relationship would be worth the potential loss of your friendship?
Breakups are challenging eventsand staying friendly after you've gone through one can be hard. At the very least, if you do date your guy friend and then both decide it's not working, there will be some time before you can be friends again, and it may never go back to the way it was. However, if you don't like him, and you don't think a relationship is worth even temporarily sacrificing your friendship, then you have to decide whether or not you can or should talk to him about his feelings for you.
It may be easier to get it all out in the open so that he knows that his feelings are not going to be reciprocated. Then he can decide what to do about that. However, it can be hard to bring those feelings up, and a confrontation can come across defensively and blow-up the friendship. If you believe that you or your guy friend cannot comfortably handle an open conversation about this issue, then it may be best to send less direct als.
The next time he engages in behavior that you think is his expression of affection, don't engage with it or encourage it. For example, when he's flirty, don't play along, or when he tries to do favors for you, don't let him.
Over time, he will get the al that he needs to find another place to share his desire for attachment. However you proceed, it is almost always better to get the issue out in the open. Direct or indirect communication, either one is better than learning that your guy friend has feelings for you, then continuing as normal. If you aren't honest about what you know, you run the risk of taking advantage of your friend, and possibly even leading them on.
Romance can develop anywhere, and it can easily develop out of close friendships. Though we used to believe that men didn't develop strong feelings, we now know that's not true. Learning to understand whether or not a guy friend's behavior means he likes you can save both of you a lot of trouble, and even help you find a great romantic partner.
Relationship counselors are experts at interpreting the behavior of others and helping people make responsible decisions. Deciding what to do about a friend who's into you can be a tense situation. The expert therapists at ReGain are ready and willing to help you decide what's going on with your guy friends and what to do about it. Understanding human behavior is hard.
If you use the guidelines above and look for the common s of affection, you will be well on your way to knowing whether a guy has feelings for you. Once you know, you should act on that knowledge. In the end, you'll both be happier. The s that a guy likes you could be subtle, or they could be a little bit more obvious.
Some telltale s and unmistakable s that a guy likes you include:. Some of the other biggest s he likes you could include commenting sweet things on your social media posts, checking up on your social media all of the time, initiating hangouts or conversations, and getting excited to see you. Of course, any friend will be excited to see you, but it's a particularly good he's interested when it's paired with some of the other biggest s a guy likes you.
Especially if it's a hugelike him getting jealous of other guys who show interest in you, it's something to take note of. Especially if this is a new male friend or someone that isn't a friend and that you just met, it can be hard to tell sometimes if he likes you or if he's just a friendly and affectionate person. For those who are already good friends with the person in question, one of the s your male friend has feelings for you is that he treats you differently than he used to. Perhaps, his level of physical touch used to mimic that of your platonic male friends and female friends, and his verbal communication with you mimicked that of your platonic male friends and female friends as well.
Now, however, you notice that your male friend is brushing your arm a lot, moving closer to you, making prolonged eye contact, and is maybe even flirting with you. This change in behavior is a probable that he thinks of you as more than just a friend. Men and women can certainly be just friends and remain just friends.Is my guy friend interested in dating me
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Does My Guy Friend Have Feelings For Me? Learning To Read His Behavior